Gobble Gobble

I totally cancelled Thanksgiving this year. Skipping it. I had this romantic ideal of getting in the car and going on a spontaneous road trip, eating Thanksgiving at a truck stop but then I remembered that I REALLY like stuffing. And Pie. And Gravy. DAMMNIT – Thanksgiving is back on!

Plus dear friends, I promised you the annual Thanksgiving playlist, and I hate to go back on a promise.

Why wait any longer – here is the Bittersweet Susie 2015 Playlist!

And for those of you cooking all day – here is a compilation of THREE YEARS of Thanksgiving playlist tunes. You know who loves you, right??

Thanksgiving Cooking Marathon

If you subscribe to my spotify channel you get get access to these playlists BEFORE they get posted to the blog. VIP ALL THE WAY.

I also have a Vintage Recipe test for you all – it’s a good one! And not in a SO BAD IT’S GOOD – but a “this is tasty and easy and thank you recipe writer from 1962.”

My mother has one of those little brand advertising recipe pamphlets from the early 60’s that she has had as long as I can remember. She hides it so none of us kids can “borrow” it. There are some recipes in there that we will accept NO SUBSTITUTE – they are the base for a lot of family celebrations and fond childhood memories.

I think a lot of these little pamphlets were considered freebees and throwaways but a lot of great recipes and artwork are in these little suckers. I have quite a collection going for me. But this ONE Eagle Brand my mom has is no where to be found. The hunt shall continue.

I needed to make a Pumpkin Pie for our office potluck. I picked out some fancy pants epicurious recipe – which I am sure would have been FAB but also contained 87 ingredients and an equal number of steps. My mom, being the smartest lady on the planet said “Fuck That!” and gave me a photo copy of a Pumpkin Pie recipe from her magical Eagle Brand book. Moms are the BEST, wouldn’t you agree?

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

Magic Pumpkin Pie

(Makes one 9-inch pie)

  • 1 unbaked 9 inch pastry shell
  • 2 cups canned pumpkin
  • 1 can Eagle Brand Sweetened Condensed Milk
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
  • 1/2 teaspoon ginger
  • 3/4 teaspoon cinnamon

In a large-sized bowl, blend together all ingredients. Turn into shell. Bake in moderate (375 degrees) over 50-55 minutes or until knife inserted near center comes out clean. Cool. Refrigerate at least 1 hour.

Uhm EASIEST RECIPE EVER!

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

The main ingredients are canned pumpkin and a whole can of sweetened condenced milk. I am already slightly concerned BUT my coworkers are good sports (they have tested a vintage recipe for me before) so I continue on.

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

Looking a little better. I didn’t have all those spices separately so I just dumped a heap of pumpkin pie spice in there. Clearly this is an exact science.

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

That’s more like it…

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

A word about crust. I hate it. I find traditional pie crust to be a complete waste of butter and I am not interested in rolling anything out with a rolling pin. Fuck. That. I cheated and bought a frozen crust.

THERE! I ADMITTED IT!

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

Bittersweet Susie - Thanksgiving 2015

Looks good to me!

Bittersweet Susie Thanksgiving 2015

Pie cooling on this awesome window ledge that I am convinced was designed SPECIFICALLY for this task. And on to the test:

My coworkers are brave souls- really! And totally game with the vintage recipe tests. I ask my subjects to be brutally honest. Some have no problem while others don’t like hurting my feelings. DO IT FOR SCIENCE PEOPLE.

Ashley: “I really like it.” REALLY? “Yea, it’s really good. I wouldn’t change a thing”

Karli: Reminds me of sweet ground – the depth of the flavors.

Ali : *having it with Reddi Whip* “hmmmmm a lot of spice, which I really like – but not overwhelming. It’s kinda fluffy. It’s good, it’s one of the most flavorful pumpkin pies I have ever had.”

Danielle: “It’s really good – and tell them I’m fat so I should know!”

Gretchen: “This is really good. I am normally not a huge fn of pumpkin pie but I would eat this for sure!”

Lori: (surprised) “It’s good! It’s really good! It tastes as good as a store bought pie but it isn’t as dry. It tastes whipped!”

Holly: “It’s deliciouso!”

Kevin: “It was good but I am not the best person to ask – I use it primarily as a whip cream delivery system.”

I tried it too folks, I was skeptical and I am PICKY about desserts, and it WAS GOOD. It took 5 mins to whip up and then bake. hands down the easiest dessert I have ever made. I hope this helps you if you need a last minute dessert to take to your Aunt Martha’s house. I promise not to tell her you didn’t make the crust.

 

If you would like to see past Thanksgiving posts check out 2013 and 2014 here. Please subscribe to my blog so you don’t miss a post (when I remember to post)

 

I am certainly thankful for you readers and friends! Have a great weekend.

 

You still have homework though:

• What is your parent’s or grandparent’s go to cookbook?

• Do you have a dish that is your favorite family tradition for Thanksgiving?

• What are your kitchen tricks you don’t tell anyone about?

 

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Pieathon! Vintage recipe swap!

Hi everyone. Sorry I have been away!

I have been busy with a new job and things! All is well – I promise!

I am so happy to come back with an awesome recipe test (along with some rad fellow bloggers).

Onto the PIEATHON!!

2ndannual

We each had to submit a vintage recipe – and were give one in return.

One of my FAVORITE blogs Silverscreen Suppers got mine! Check it out!

The assignment I was given was Blueberry Cream Pie from Good Housekeeping’s Party Pie Book (1958)

Luckily this seemed like a simple recipe. I had great plans to make this mid week and to shoot some friends enjoying said pie and that just didn’t happen. I worked the Pinupgirl Clothing Yard sale and shit got crazy. Literally people were acting crazy! (but that is another post for another time)

Here is the recipe I was given:

blueberrycreampie1

\blueberrycreampie2

I gathered my ingredients and just replaced the whipping cream with cool whip – That’s fine, right? I am tired and will have to do. I also got a pre-made crust. God bless AMERICA!

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Make the jello instant pudding per recipe directions, you don’t use as much milk because you are going for a custard filling. Then you fold in some whip cream – or in my case – COOL WHIP!

   Blueberry Cream Pie from Good Housekeeping’s Party Pie Book (1958)

You think that’s enough? I may need to test it!

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Then you make the pie filling. I used fresh berries because it is summertime here! Lemon zest always makes everything better!

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I pulled the pie crust from the over and the damn thing steamed up my lens!

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Put the filling in the crust! Just give me a spoon!

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Carefully (it’s hot!) pour the fruit filling on top! Place back in fridge to SET!

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So – I did this LATE last night and have no one to test the pie. I am going to take it to work and update the post later!

I am going to take it to work and make my CO-workers partake. I hope I don’t kill them!

I know – I AM SUCH a procrastinator!

Don’t forget to come back and check how this pie came out! There will be an update in this post TONIGHT!

UPDATE – TASTE TEST

I brought the pie into my office for my lovely coworkers! They were brave but also utterly starving! (lunch was over 2 hours late and the natives were getting restless)

Holly : Your pie ROCKS!

Ali : Can definitely taste the lemon – more than the blueberry. It’s good but overwhelming. It’s more custard with blueberries.

Justine : Exactly what she said. A little too mushy for my taste.

Lori : I liked it – it was very Jello-tastic!

Susie (ME) : It tastes like nothing (I ate the whole piece though)

Gretchen : It tastes really familiar. . . I can taste the vanilla. It would be good with a cheesecake base. A little thicker and not so pudding like.

Talia : It had a weird aftertaste. You can taste the fakeness!

The Verdict: I agree it would be better without the crust and just served as a custard. It did not hold its shape well when cut. I may have used a little too much lemon in the sauce and I used fresh blueberries. Frozen may have had a more concentrated flavor. With all that and the reviews being said the general consensus was it was a nice cool treat on a really hot afternoon. It took less than 15 minutes to make and used very easy ingredients. I would totally recommend this for a festive BBQ – especially for someone who doesn’t bake a lot. Thanks so much lady friends for helping me! You are the best!

Office pie eating realness:

Bittersweet Susie | Pie A Thon

Please check out my fellow Pie-a-thon mates below! Recipe swaps are my favorite!

Balls

Hey there! I made you some balls!

RUM BALLS!

These are easy, no bake and TOTALLY full of booze. A win on all fronts.

Rum Balls | Ehow | Bittersweet Susie

I photographed a cooking tutorial for EHOW – it is never too early to start planning your holiday baking.

Rum Balls | Ehow | Bittersweet Susie

Yes, actually it is too damn early but you can bookmark it for later.

Rum Balls | Ehow | Bittersweet Susie

Homework:

• What are your favorite holiday cooking recipes?

• Are you willing to share this recipe?

• Will you still like me if I eat the last cookie?



The Pintester Rolls On – Vol 3

Hello again friends!

It has been so dang busy around here! And not in the FUN way.

Can we real talk for one moment? What the hell SEPTEMBER is almost over? What happened to my summer? I completely missed it! I don’t remember participating in it one bit. It never got hot, I never went to the beach. I think I took a swim once! I want a REMATCH. As much as I love Halloween fall can FUCK RIGHT OFF. I am not ready. I am hitting the snooze button on this one. Take your pumpkin bread and SHOVE it.

Okayyyyyy – what we are here for – let’s get to it – to it.

Remember my other rumbles with testing those Pinterest pins? Check them out if you haven’t. Go look again anyways, I’ll wait.

Round 1 – Image Transfers

Round 2 – Leave room for Jesus

pintester-movement-500-plain

Well today is another PINTESTER MOVEMENT – round 3 for me! I was a little LATE to the party on this one. I went looking through saved pins for something quick. That’s the point of some of these pin’s right? Life hacks, quick meals and SNACKS. Well this time I actually need something quick and easy so this is a REAL LIFE TEST. Real life folks. FOR REALS.

Go on over and check out what all the other testers are working on at the Pintester Movement – I promise it will be worth it!

And check out Sonia’s Site – Pintester for all round hilarity

I decided to try the 2 – Minute Chocolate Chip Cookie for One

A couple things to note here:

A chocolate chip cookie, FOR ONE. Could there anything more sad cat lady than that? Oh don’t mind me, in my sweatpants, on a friday night, making a GIANT COOKIE for me, myself, and I. Thanks Pinterest for making me feel awesome! The worst part is I got a flu shot on friday and I was feeling under the weather, and made this in mah sweatpants. I will mention they were my fanciest sweatpants though.

Here is the recipe:

Ingredients

  • 2 tbsp (3O grams) unsalted butter,softened
  • 1 1/2 tbsp (2O grams) white granulated sugar
  • 1 1/2 tbsp (2O grams) brown sugar
  • 2 tbsp (3Oml) beaten egg
  • 1/4 tsp vanilla extract
  • 5 tbsp (60 grams) all purpose flour
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • pinch salt
  • 1/4 cup (40 grams) chocolate chips

That’s it. No other instructions. No when to add, how to mix. SUPER. I picked a winner here friends. You are WELCOME.

Since I bake cookies often I just went in the order I would do that. Here we go:

Everything worth anything starts with butter….

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

2 dang tablespoons – for one – one for each of your buttcheeks. These are supposed to be softened.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Annnd too much. Oh well – off to a smashing start. Next add the brown and white sugars.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

This is an equal opportunity cookie. That is a lot of goddamn sugar for one cookie.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Next we add two tablespoons of a beaten egg. This part annoyed the crap out of me. Egg waster.

And it was hard to measure. Mix Mix Mix. Fork Fork Fork.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Now add flour, vanilla (that’s the dark spot) baking soda and some salt!

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester MovementThis looks like is is going to be DRY and reminds me of easy bake batters.

I have an easy bake oven – I should have popped it in there  – next time!

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

1/4 cup of chocolate chips! SO MANY! of course anything with THIS MUCH is going to taste good! CHEATERS!

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Since there are no instructions I am assuming the 2 mins was the cook time?  On High? Sure!

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Nuking the ever loving shit out of my cookie. Contemplating what has gone wrong in my life.

I think I see jesus in the reflection.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

Here it is folks. Overwhelmed aren’t you. Meh. Me too.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

This tastes like an ok stale, dry cake. It was ok. Mom and Dad joined in the tasting (they are GREAT SPORTS) Mom said ehhhh – as we kept eating.

Dad said, It’s good, but walked away. That means he was being polite. The walk away is a true sign.

Bittersweet Susie | Pintester Movement

We put chocolate sauce on, MINOR improvement.

Final notes:

Oh where do I begin. I don’t know why I continued with a pin that had no instructions. If you have all these baking ingredients – MAKE A REAL FUCKING COOKIE, maybe a whole dozen. Share them with others. This cooking for one in the microwave is dumb. That being said I ate the entire thing.

Homework:

• Have you seen Jesus in your microwave?

• Do you have a favorite snack/microwave recipe?

• Should I have used more chocolate chips?

• Can I have your cat?

Until next time – don’t be a stranger!

 

Knoxapocalypse!

Hello Everyone! How are things? Oh, that sounds nice…

Have I told you all about one of my most FAVORITE BLOGS EVER? I haven’t? Well how very rude of me. Please forgive me friends, I know not what I do. The Mid Century Menu is pretty much the single greatest idea for a blog, EVER. Retro Ruth is the keeper of a treasure trove of Mid Century cookbooks and Recipes. Along with featuring the great artwork, kitschy titles, wacky ingredients, and eBay listings so readers can start their own collection she also has started to make one vintage recipe a week. Really. She tries a vintage, cray, holy shit that looks gross, no thank you I am full recipe EVERY WEEK and then makes her husband Tom try it first. I am PRETTY sure he is a willing participant. She is all sorts of awesome – I wouldn’t say no to her EITHER. Please head over there and check it out, you will not regret it! Oh maybe wait an hour after a big meal? LIKE SWIMMING!

When I saw the opportunity to participate in a gelatin vintage recipe test I JUMPED for a chance to play. If Lance Bass offered you his spot on the 110 second Nsync reunion tour, you would take it, RIGHT? DUH! (that was some crap JUSTIN STAGE HOG MOVING ON)

The participants and I were given some rules, cause Mid Century cooking means BUSINESS:

It’s Knox Apocalypse Part II, and you have been chosen to take part! Here are the rules:
1. NO SUBSTITUTIONS
2. Recipes should be from your own collection
3. Original pictures of the recipe aren’t required, but are preferred!
4. It MUST contain gelatin in some form.
Here are the other WONDERFUL participants – I am putting them up top because I have a feeling this post is going to be wordy! GO CHECK THEM OUT YO!
Emily – Olive Wreath Mold
Erica – Betty Davis’s Mustard Ring
Brian – Maple Fluff
Mimi – Molded Avocado and Tuna
Jenny – Turkey In Aspic
Ruth – Pickle and Pineapple Salad
I am stoked to be in this lineup – all these blogs rock my socks, bookmark this shit ASAP.
How this worked: We each sent Ruth a recipe and then she scrambled them up and divided them out! I was really nervous during the in between that my VERY WORST FEAR EVER IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE WOULD COME TRUE:

PLEASE BABY JESUS NO TUNA!

You guys, if i get tuna – I WILL FOR SURE BARF. This is serious! I waited, stomach in knots! Finally, the email came:

NOT TUNNNAAAAA! But Holy crap, this looks EXTRA GROSS TOO.

Knoxapocalypse | Bittersweet Susie

Ok – what the HELL is nonfat dry milk – GAG – BLEH! And VERY RIPE Cantaloupe! SUPER! Can’t wait.

So confession time friends, I hate jello. I won’t really eat it (and by really I mean EVER) but I LOVE making it. I feel like I am doing science experiments or potions or something. Maybe if I say some magic words this will come out of my jello mold in one piece!

Deep breaths – pep talk – theme song? I think this FOR SURE calls for a theme song:

OH JUST KIDDING (but if you have not watched that yet you go ahead and treat YOURSELF)

THIS:

Let’s DO THIS!

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

I washed off my Tupperware Jello mold set. This was my mom’s and she was slightly amused to see it being put to use. We both appreciate the design of the jello molds, just wish it wasn’t so GROSS AND JIGGLY. Mom’s memories of jello’s of her youth – cabbage, green peppers, and PIMENTOS floating in JELLO – it was GROSS!

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

The recipe calls for a whole extremely ripe cantaloupe. This spells T R O U B L E from the start. Mine was ripe enough. My apologies for wasting you you gorgeous thing you. You went for a good cause though. God Speed.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

Mash with fork. KISS MY ASS. SMASH with awesome potato masher. HULK SMASSSHHHHHHHHH.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

Right? I would be here all damn night with a fork. Stupid.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

Add gelatin to cold water to soften. The store had knox. I was under the misconception that Knox was no more but the knox was three times as much as the generic so KROGER it is friends. Only the best for you because I love you. No one is going to eat this anyways.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

Now you have something that looks like Slimer might have left it behind. Quick, get a toaster, play it some tunes and let’s see if it dances!

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

OK, so i added the gelatin to the smashed cantaloupe and then heated it up, it’s not smelling great because warm cantaloupe is NOT its natural habitat. Then let it cool to watch it thicken. It never really thickened. Hrmmmmm.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

And now: the worst part. Non fat dry milk. What is this stuff for? Who invented it? Why does it still exist? I have so many questions! I added non fat dry milk, water, lemon juice, and vanilla and was instructed to whip it into a frenzy until it formed stiff peaks. THAT. NEVER. HAPPENED. Not even little bunny hills. It just smelled like baby spit up. Not a fan. BLEH.

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

It all was “folded” together, which didn’t really work because the fluffy milk part was a syrupy failure. I swirled it around and prayed to sweet baby jesus AMEN. I was STOKED it actually fit in the mold. WOOO. Small victories.

And LOOOK! IT CAME OUT OF THE MOLD AND EVERYTHING!!

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse

It smells like cantaloupe and sweet milk (baby spit up if you ask me). My dad was the VERY brave soul who was going to try this. He says he LIKES things like fruit cocktail, jello, SPAM, liver and onions which he never gets because my mom cooks awesome things like fancy salad with kale and home make dressing and lovely roast chicken. Maybe if he is lucky Santa will bring him some nice Vienna Sausages in a can for Christmas this year!

Ok Dad… You Ready??

Bittersweet Susie | Knoxapocalypse | Dad the test Subject

HE LOVES IT! BARFFFFF! (click on this to see it bigger – worth it)

Dad: “Tastes like the cantaloupe was over ripe – that’s the problem with it…”

Me: “Not the other crap it was floating in?”

Mom: “The only good thing about jello is JELLO SHOTS.” (clearly the voice of reason in this family)

Participating in this challenge was AWESOME! I really want to try more vintage recipes but I think I would have to find a new test audience every time. That, or I would have to keep my dad’s wine glass very full.

Thanks for sticking around for that EXTREMELY long post! I really like you guys.

Homework: (comment below)

• Do you have a vintage recipe you have always wanted to try?

• Do you have family recipe that you LOVE but might be kind of GROSS by modern standards?

• What is your stance on things floating in gelatin?

• How awesome are my parents?

Pintester Movement – Leave Room for Jesus

Hi Friends! Thanks for joining me for the 2nd edition of the Pintester Movement! I hope you liked the first round and I hope you shot on over to Sonja’s to check out the other participants and all around hilarity.

Pintester Movement

This challenge we had to choose a pin that she has already tested on the Pintester site. There were so many to choose from but I had a few criteria that I wanted for this challenge: it had to be snacks and it had to be EASY.

Now I am an avid baker and a firm believer in baking everything from scratch, but have you ever tried photograph each baking step with your fancy pants camera when you have butter and sugar on your hands? It’s the worst idea EVER. I do not know how food bloggers do it. They must force their children into being child photo laborers. I know that’s what I would do.

So for my challenge I chose

Resurrection Rolls!

Somebody's Hungry - For CHRIST!

Somebody’s Hungry – For CHRIST!

Here is the version on the Pintester site.

Here is the original site with the recipe

I collect thrift store Jesus paintings and other such awesomeness (if anyone has a Velvet Jesus painting send it my way) so any way to get a little CHEESY JESUS into our lives – BRING IT!

I went to Catholic school for 12 years and this stuff cracks me up. I don’t think you could ever convince a Catholic school kid that any of this was a good idea. It was way more fire and brimstone and SIN and GUILT and way less tasty snacks. Maybe if they use red food coloring to symbolize Jesus’ blood to make it more authentic? Oh the possibilities.

Baking along to tell the story of Jesus getting put in a Tomb after he kicked the bucket? Sign me up! Baking with 2 ingredients I buy and don’t have to make? Double Sold!

I was listening to this little tune while doing this project. I feel it just WORKS

Let’s get STARTED

You will need:

  • Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
  • Large Marshmallows
  • Melted Butter (I only needed 1 Tablespoon)
  • Small bowl of cinnamon and sugar for dipping Marshmallows

Yea THAT’S IT – SO FANCY

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

The Marshmallows stand for JESUS in this here recipe – Howdy Jesus! You are delish and I will use the rest of you to make some unholy Rice Krispies.

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You know the most frightening and thrilling part of this whole process was opening that canister. I was met with a lackluster thud for this round.

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

Then you roll your Jesus Marshmallow in the melted butter – this is supposed to be the oils they put on his body or something when he died. I forget the specifics of that chapter. I used to think why waste the spendy oils on a dead guy, but maybe it would help with the STINK that was soon to follow. Hmmm, Still Hungry? Me TOO!

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

Then you roll Jesus in Cinnamon and Sugar! I don’t know what the religious meaning is here – so he tastes GREAT!

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

Then you wrap Jesus in the HOLY CRESCENT roll. As you can see there are going to be problems. I did not adequately wrap the Jesus marshmallow in the tomb thing which means explosions. I was a little rough with the crescent rolls and ripped a few. One was completely beyond repair so I was forced to eat that one raw. FORCED.

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

Pintester Movement | Resurrection Rolls | Bittersweet Susie

Jesus! Oh the Humanity!

Ok you guys, these were freaking AMAZING! Right out of the oven they were so freaking tasty. WOAH. My mother and I pretty much polished off the entire batch, in 5 minutes. If Communion was this good I would be the FATTEST kid in church. I would have gone back for seconds. AMEN. We decided to leave a couple for the next day, for science. Mostly because our stomachs hurt from eating them ALL. Maybe the Lord was punishing us. Gluttony is still a thing, right? The next day they were chewy and stale. Not as wondrous and delicious as right out of the oven. Jesus must be consumed right away. Remind me to tell you about that time I stuck the Eucharist under the pew so I didn’t have to eat it- that shit is GROSS.

jesus baking

Thanks for joining me friends! See you next time!